He's been off work. I'm sure the keys are sticky on his Mac.Originally Posted by Origanalist
It is never too early for Oyarde to accept nice gifts to celebrate the birth of Jesus .
Do something Danke
That's how you keep the Christmas spirit year round.
Uh, Zippy, don't look now but that's because all the new catalogs are on your smart phone.
My phone is smooth. Maybe Zippy has a pop socket on his case that's catching on his bung hole.
@Danke
Prisoner Escapes Death After Phone Gets Stuck in Rectum
https://www.kenyans.co.ke/news/35127...s-stuck-rectum
By DENIS MWANGI on 1 December 2018 - 8:52 am
An inmate from Manyani Maximum Security Prison is nursing injuries after undergoing a surgery to remove a mobile phone that was stuck in his rectum.
It is reported that he was trying to conceal the gadget from prison wardens.
The move backfired after the gadget failed to come out giving the inmate a severe stomach ache.
He was forced to reveal to prison officers when he couldn't withstand the agony of failing to pass stool for three days.
Moi County Referral Hospital’s medical superintendent Kagona Gitau said doctors were observing him after a successful operation.
The prison officer in charge, Nicholas Maswai, said the inmates use the phones to defraud residents and added that disciplinary actions will be taken against the inmate.
Prisoners are notorious for scamming people out of their money through impersonation.
They send text messages to unsuspecting people claiming to be their friends or business associate and ask their target to send them money.
Former Local Government Permanent Secretary (PS) Sammy Kirui landed himself in trouble after he was found with a phone illegally in Industrial Area Prison.
During a random inspection by prison wardens, Kirui was discovered to be in possession of the phone which he had been using for an unspecified period.
Why the mention in this post?
Pfizer Macht Frei!
Openly Straight Man, Danke, Awarded Top Rated Influencer. Community Standards Enforcer.
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The Federalist Papers, No. 15:
Except as to the rule of appointment, the United States have an indefinite discretion to make requisitions for men and money; but they have no authority to raise either by regulations extending to the individual citizens of America.
He got his phone stuck in his prison wallet. That's nasty!
I want a
* Computer with cut-n-paste
* Protective case for my new computer - Pink or sparkly. Preferably both.
* Mouse for my new Computer - Also, pink/sparkly
* fuzzy socks - sock monkey socks
* funny notebook I saw on Amazon - it says, "I don't need an inspirational quote, I need coffee" - I thought that was inspirational
* Something silly - I saw a remote controlled poop in $5 Below. I would LOVE that thing. The box says it leaves skid marks and batteries are not included so tape some batteries to the box.
* Some liquid glitter eyeshadow in gold
* Nivea tinted lip balm
* Aldi white chocolate coconut candy bars
* A new hair Tribble. My hair is too short to get a nice bun when I pull it back so I bought a scrunchie that is fake hair. My kids say it looks like a Tribble. Anyway, my hair Tribble is looking a little mangy.
I would be very upset if you missed hard hitting, breaking news like that.
All computers "cut and paste"...
Why not be practical?* Something silly - I saw a remote controlled poop in $5 Below. I would LOVE that thing. The box says it leaves skid marks and batteries are not included so tape some batteries to the box.
I got a pair of these for my little brother years ago:
"The Skid Mark Underwear Money Safe"
https://www.amazon.com/Brief-Safe-Un.../dp/B00GJ0WYQS
I suggest you just go with the liquid glitter gold eyeshadow and the nivea tinted lip balm . Thats hot . The mangy hair tribble not so much .
Do something Danke
I could probably use some 20 Gauge #2 & #3 Buckshot , some 12 gauge #1 & #4 Buckshot , some Rhodesian Jungle Rounds , some .410 & 12 Ga Flechettes , some .410 000 Buck , 12 Ga incendiary , some .32 ACP , 9MM , .38 , .30 - .30 Winchester .
Do something Danke
Craptop II doesn't cut-n-paste, it just moves all the letters around.All computers "cut and paste"...
Why not be practical?
I got a pair of these for my little brother years ago:
"The Skid Mark Underwear Money Safe"
https://www.amazon.com/Brief-Safe-Un.../dp/B00GJ0WYQSThe few stories I've posted took me a long time to get the cutter to work without the jumble. Also, this computer doesn't have screen shot. It's a Windows 8, how in the heck does it not have screen shot?
That's just nasty.
They're not mangy when they're new. I didn't take proper care of my tribble and it got all matted and some of the hair came out.
Mr A took me shopping today. We had to take back the black jeans I ordered for my son. I ordered straight leg but they were gay leg (very skinny jeans). By we, I mean me. Mr A sat in a bar and had a beer while I was doing returns. I didn't have one, it was too cold.
We ended up buying a bunch of stuff at The Dollar Tree for me to wear at work. I got some antlers, a sequined Santa hat, and a light up Christmas light headband. I also bought a bunch of Strawberry jam and pizza sauce at the Dollar Tree - they're really good, btw.
Mr A promised to take me to lunch and he took me to the damn Captain D. WTF? Cheap ass. He had a coupon for a 15.00 family meal. That man bought 10 pieces of fish for just the two of us. He found the coupons in the mail. Mr A loves him a coupon, lol.
Anyway, we didn't end up buying any gifts. Just a few groceries, a beer, and some Captain D.
What's Captain D?
All the cash that's in mine says you wouldn't steal it.
You'd loose that cash, lol. I have sons and brothers and they're all nasty. That wouldn't be the first pair of $#@!ty drawers I picked up.
Fish house with crab cakes and fish Like Long John Silver.
Do something Danke
I saw Harbor Freight has an electric ,Central Machinery three speed portable blower with a heater attachment I could probably use one of those @Danke , looks like both pc.'s 85.58 with tax . PM me and I can give you the address for my outbuilding .
Last edited by oyarde; 12-06-2018 at 11:26 AM.
Do something Danke
I would never buy you any of that cheap crap from Harbor Freight.
Pfizer Macht Frei!
Openly Straight Man, Danke, Awarded Top Rated Influencer. Community Standards Enforcer.
Quiz: Test Your "Income" Tax IQ!
Short Income Tax Video
The Income Tax Is An Excise, And Excise Taxes Are Privilege Taxes
The Federalist Papers, No. 15:
Except as to the rule of appointment, the United States have an indefinite discretion to make requisitions for men and money; but they have no authority to raise either by regulations extending to the individual citizens of America.
Oh God, no...so, essentially, a "Waffle House" with fish.
Now that I think of it, I believe Mrs AF worked there for a while as a teenager.
FFS, so make a trip up by me sometime, I'll turn you on to a real seafood restaurant.
Tell Mr. Animal to limber up his wallet though.
I would probably pick the waffle house over Captain D but I do not think Mr A gave Suzanimal a choice , he had his coupon and a mission .LOL . Ya we know you have better seafood .
Do something Danke
I bet Danke plans on making you both a pair of underwear safe. As a matter of fact, I bet he's working on them right now.All computers "cut and paste"...
Why not be practical?
I got a pair of these for my little brother years ago:
"The Skid Mark Underwear Money Safe"
https://www.amazon.com/Brief-Safe-Un.../dp/B00GJ0WYQS
That means he cares...
When she posted that, it was way past her bedtime if she ever expects her mandatory beauty sleep will do any good.
Pfizer Macht Frei!
Openly Straight Man, Danke, Awarded Top Rated Influencer. Community Standards Enforcer.
Quiz: Test Your "Income" Tax IQ!
Short Income Tax Video
The Income Tax Is An Excise, And Excise Taxes Are Privilege Taxes
The Federalist Papers, No. 15:
Except as to the rule of appointment, the United States have an indefinite discretion to make requisitions for men and money; but they have no authority to raise either by regulations extending to the individual citizens of America.
Here ya go, Merry Christmas.
Pfizer Macht Frei!
Openly Straight Man, Danke, Awarded Top Rated Influencer. Community Standards Enforcer.
Quiz: Test Your "Income" Tax IQ!
Short Income Tax Video
The Income Tax Is An Excise, And Excise Taxes Are Privilege Taxes
The Federalist Papers, No. 15:
Except as to the rule of appointment, the United States have an indefinite discretion to make requisitions for men and money; but they have no authority to raise either by regulations extending to the individual citizens of America.
I have a 20 percent coupon , how did you rate a 25 percent ?Here ya go, Merry Christmas.
Do something Danke
White Privilege.
Pfizer Macht Frei!
Openly Straight Man, Danke, Awarded Top Rated Influencer. Community Standards Enforcer.
Quiz: Test Your "Income" Tax IQ!
Short Income Tax Video
The Income Tax Is An Excise, And Excise Taxes Are Privilege Taxes
The Federalist Papers, No. 15:
Except as to the rule of appointment, the United States have an indefinite discretion to make requisitions for men and money; but they have no authority to raise either by regulations extending to the individual citizens of America.
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