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Thread: Live like a king with this dick bidet

  1. #1

    Default Live like a king with this dick bidet

    https://www.engadget.com/2016/09/06/...is-dick-bidet/

    Andrew Tarantola, @terrortola 09.06.16



    Men, ask yourselves, "is my cock really as clean as it could be?" I mean, you wash your hands after using public restrooms (or at least you should, you filthy bastards) so why wouldn't you give your Rob Thomas a quick cleaning while you're at it? With this new high-tech urinal you'll be able to do just that.

    Behold, the Urinary 2.0! This smart urinal is packed with sensors that monitor your stream and activates the cleaning mechanism as soon as you stop. The urinal will spritz soapy water on your hog for three seconds before a hand dryer-esque blower dries your nethers. What's more, the wash cycle cools the spray in the summer and warms it in the winter because dammit, you deserve to be pampered every now and again. And, best of all, for those of you not hung like donkeys, the urinal will adapt its aim to spritz you right in the family jewels, not on your pants.

    The Urinary 2.0 is currently in its prototype phase, though its Spanish development team -- comprised of biochemist Eduard Gevorkyan, economist Ivan Giner and business coach Miguel Angel Levanteri -- are currently in talks to sell their patent to another company for €680,000, or about $765,300. The team is also working on a version for the ladies as well. That means we could be just a few short years away from seeing these full-service piss pots in public restrooms across the globe! Just remember to forgo the hot wax undercoating. It's a total ripoff.
    The essential English leadership secret does not depend on particular intelligence. Rather, it depends on a remarkably stupid thick-headedness. The English follow the principle that when one lies, one should lie big, and stick to it. They keep up their lies, even at the risk of looking ridiculous.



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  3. #2

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    $#@!in' city dwellers....

    We do things a bit differently out here;



  4. #3

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    I'm not sticking my dick into any machine. Whether a dick bidet or robot pussy. I'm just old fashioned that way. I guess.
    He has combined with others to subject us to a jurisdiction foreign to our constitution,
    and unacknowledged by our laws;
    giving his Assent to their Acts of pretended Legislation:

  5. #4

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    Looks like the inventor was thinking about a car wash and then his penis.

  6. #5

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    Quote Originally Posted by phill4paul View Post
    I'm not sticking my dick into any machine. Whether a dick bidet or robot pussy. I'm just old fashioned that way. I guess.
    If teh feminazis steal teh women we may not have a choice, comrade... :'(
    Quote Originally Posted by Torchbearer
    what works can never be discussed online. there is only one language the government understands, and until the people start speaking it by the magazine full... things will remain the same.
    Hear/buy my music here"government is the enemy of liberty"-RPEphesians 6:12 (KJV)For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.

  7. #6

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    Quote Originally Posted by heavenlyboy34 View Post
    If teh feminazis steal teh women we may not have a choice, comrade... :'(
    we've always got man's best friend. woof

  8. #7

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    Quote Originally Posted by phill4paul View Post
    I'm not sticking my dick into any machine. Whether a dick bidet or robot pussy. I'm just old fashioned that way. I guess.

    Don't need a weather man to know which way the wind blows

  9. #8

    Default

    I stopped reading because I can't stop laughing lmao.....

    Men, ask yourselves, "is my cock really as clean as it could be?"
    There are only two things we should fight for. One is the defense of our homes and the other is the Bill of Rights. War for any other reason is simply a racket.
    -Major General Smedley Butler, USMC,
    Two-Time Congressional Medal of Honor Winner
    Author of, War is a Racket!

    It is not that I am mad, it is only that my head is different from yours.
    - Diogenes of Sinope

  10. #9
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    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by specsaregood View Post
    we've always got man's best friend. woof
    eeyup


  11. #10

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    I already got one.
    But the fact of the matter is that there are often times in life even a curmudgeonly, misanthropic old grouch like myself has to "join the team" to accomplish a larger goal. -AF

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