I TOOK AN INTERNET INK BLOT TEST TO FIND MY TRUE SELF BUT QUIT HALFWAY THROUGH. ALL THE INK BLOTS LOOKED LIKE PEOPLE DANCING (EXCEPT THE ONE BUTTERFLY) BUT THAT WASN'T ONE OF THE OPTIONS. HELL, BUTTERFLY WASN'T EVEN AN OPTION AND THAT LOOKED JUST LIKE A FRICKIN BUTTERFLY.
TEST WIZARD SUCKS. IF YOU WANT TO FIND YOUR TRUE SELF, BETTER STICK TO BUZZFEED QUIZZES. AT LEAST THEY MAKE SENSE.
Originally Posted by Ron Paul
HOW DOES ONE LOOSE THEIR TRUE SELF IN THE FIRST PLACE?
MY HANDS WERE FULL AND I DIDN'T HAVE POCKETS. I HOPE I DIDN'T LEAVE MY TRUE SELF IN THE THRIFT STORE. IT WILL BE AWKWARD GOING BACK AND TELLING THEM IT WASN'T A DONATION.
LIFESKILL...
STILL TRYING TO FIND MY TRUE SELF. I PLAN ON TAKING THE KAYAK OUT ON THE LAKE TODAY. MAYBE I LEFT MY TRUE SELF UNDER THE BRIDGE WITH THE BIRDS. I WAS ENJOYING WATCHING THEM IN THEIR LITTLE MUD NESTS UNTIL MY SON TOLD ME HANGING OUT UNDER THE BRIDGE IS A GOOD WAY TO GET $#@! ON. I SKEDADDLED. IN MY HASTE, I MAY HAVE LEFT MY TRUE SELF UNDER THE BRIDGE. I HOPE MY TRUE SELF ISN'T COVERED IN BIRD POOP OR HASN'T TURNED INTO A TROLL IN MY ABSENCE.
IF I FIND YOUR TRUE SELF FIRST, I'LL ONLY CHARGE YOU 50 CENTS OR SO TO GIVE IT BACK. MAYBE MORE DEPENDING ON HOW DESPERATE YOU ARE.
MY TRUE SELF SHOULD FIT IN A REGULAR ENVELOPE SO 50 CENTS SHOULD COVER THE POSTAGE. IF YOU'RE GOING TO ASK FOR ANY MORE THAN THAT, YOU CAN KEEP MY TRUE SELF.
FUN DAY AT THE LAKE BUT THE RIDE HOME GOT A BIT TENSE. MY SONS WERE GOOFING OFF IN THE BACKSEAT PLAYING FACE PUNCH AND THE YOUNGEST DIDN'T STOP IN TIME AND ENDED UP PUNCHING THE OLDEST IN THE NOSE. HE WAS PISSED AND THEY STARTED REAL FIGHTING. MR ANIMAL TOLD THEM IF THEY DIDN'T STOP, HE WAS GOING TO PULL OVER AND PLAY FACE PUNCH ON BOTH OF THEM. THEY STOPPED. THEN WE SPENT THE REST OF THE RIDE HOME DEBATING THE MERITS OF PLAYING FACE PUNCH. THEY THREATENED TO GO BACK TO PLAYING GUESS THAT SMELL AND I TOLD THEM TO STICK WITH PUNCHING EACH OTHER IN THE FACE BUT THEY HAD TO KEEP IT OUT OF THE CAR OR I WOULD SELL THEM TO GYPSIES.
WHO TAUGHT THEM THAT GAME?
Pfizer Macht Frei!
Openly Straight Man, Danke, Awarded Top Rated Influencer. Community Standards Enforcer.
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DANG, HUSTLER WAS $2.25 IN 1977.
AND I DIDN'T GET ON THE COVER OF HUSTLER AT SIX FLAGS. IT PROBABLY SOMETHING LAME LIKE TEEN BEAT.
WHO TAUGHT THEM THAT GAME?
I LOST MY MOJO ONCE BUT THEN I GOT IT BACK LATER
Do something Danke
PAY NO ATTENTION TO DANKE, HE'S JUST PRACTICING HIS LIFESKILLS.
STILL TRYING TO FIND MY TRUE SELF AND A CAREER
AFTER WATCHING A SCIENTOLOGY VIDEO, I THOUGHT BEING A CULT LEADER LOOKED FUN BUT THEN I SAW THAT AMERICAN IDOL AUDITIONS ARE COMING TO ATLANTA. I THINK I SHOULD SEE HOW THAT PANS OUT FIRST.
THE CULT LEADER THING SOUNDS MORE SOLID. I THINK YOU SHOULD TAKE THAT AND LET AMERICAN IDOL BE YOUR PLAN B. YOU CAN ALWAYS DROP THE CULT IF MURICAN IDOL WORKS OUT.
ME AND ARNIE DO SOMETHING SIMILAR CALLED FOOT KICK.
SOUNDS LIKE A SOLID PLAN.FIRST, I HAVE TO WRITE A BOOK ABOUT ALIENS AND GET PEOPLE TO TAKE MY INTERNET QUIZZES. I'M TOTALLY GOING TO RIP OFF HUBBARD, BTW. THERE'S NO HONOR AMONG CULTISTS. EXCEPT INSTEAD OF HAVING THOSE CENTERS, FOLKS CAN JUST TAKE QUIZZES ON THE INTERNET TO FIND THEIR TRUE SELF. NOW JUST HAVE TO FIGURE OUT IF I WANT TO USE MAGIQUIZ OR BUZZFEED. I THINK BUZZFEED SUITS MY PERSONALITY MORE. THEY HAVE LOTS OF LISTS WITH GIFS YOU CAN LOOK AT IF YOU GET BORED WITH YOUR QUIZ.
IF YOU WANT TO JOIN MY CULT, YOU HAVE TO TAKE THIS QUIZ AND POST THE RESULTS. I WILL THEN SORT YOU INTO YOUR HOUSE.
https://www.buzzfeed.com/perpetua/th...kz1#.grqm7enO3
MY RESULT.
You got: Adventurous, But Indecisive
You’re overwhelmed by lots of interesting and exciting options, and you feel pressured to experience everything before it’s too late. As a result, you have trouble sticking with anything — or anyone — for too long.
NO TAKERS ON MY CULT
OH WELL, I WENT TO SEE FOURTH OF JULY FIREWORKS TONIGHT. YEAH, THERE'S A TOWN NEARBY THAT HAS A NEARLY THE FOURTH CELEBRATION, LOL. IT WAS FUN. WE GOT A GREAT VIEWING SPOT BUT RIGHT AS THE SHOW BEGAN AN ICE CREAM TRUCK PULLED UP AND LEFT HIS MUSIC PLAYING THE WHOLE TIME. IT WAS BIZARRE AS HELL, TOO. IT WAS NORMAL ICE CREAM MUSIC BUT THEN IT HAD DUCKS QUACKINGAND IN THE PAUSE, A LITTLE GIRL VOICE SAYS, "HELLO!". BY THE TIME THE SHOW ENDED, EVERYONE AROUND THE TRUCK WAS QUACKING AND YELLING HELLO!
BEING A LEADER IS MORE FUN. WHILE YOU MAKE PEOPLE DO STUPID $#@! YOU ARE THE ONLY ONE THAT KNOWS HOW STUPID IT IS .
Do something Danke
I WOULD INCORPORATE THE TRUCK INTO MY CULT .NO TAKERS ON MY CULT
OH WELL, I WENT TO SEE FOURTH OF JULY FIREWORKS TONIGHT. YEAH, THERE'S A TOWN NEARBY THAT HAS A NEARLY THE FOURTH CELEBRATION, LOL. IT WAS FUN. WE GOT A GREAT VIEWING SPOT BUT RIGHT AS THE SHOW BEGAN AN ICE CREAM TRUCK PULLED UP AND LEFT HIS MUSIC PLAYING THE WHOLE TIME. IT WAS BIZARRE AS HELL, TOO. IT WAS NORMAL ICE CREAM MUSIC BUT THEN IT HAD DUCKS QUACKING
Do something Danke
DOESN'T SOUND LIKE A GOOD LIFESKILL TO ME, SUZ.NO TAKERS ON MY CULT
OH WELL, I WENT TO SEE FOURTH OF JULY FIREWORKS TONIGHT. YEAH, THERE'S A TOWN NEARBY THAT HAS A NEARLY THE FOURTH CELEBRATION, LOL. IT WAS FUN. WE GOT A GREAT VIEWING SPOT BUT RIGHT AS THE SHOW BEGAN AN ICE CREAM TRUCK PULLED UP AND LEFT HIS MUSIC PLAYING THE WHOLE TIME. IT WAS BIZARRE AS HELL, TOO. IT WAS NORMAL ICE CREAM MUSIC BUT THEN IT HAD DUCKS QUACKING
BEING OVERDUE BY A FEW MONTHS , TODAY I GOT A HAIRCUT .
Do something Danke
I'M PRETTY SURE THE INJUN RELIGIONS FORBID CUTTING YOUR HAIR, UNCLE OYARDE. BESIDES, YOU WARRIORS ARE SUPPOSED TO HAVE LONG HAIR (TO GO WITH THE WAR FACE PAINT) TO SCARE THE GIRLY MEN YOU FIGHT.
THAT WASN'T A LIFESKILL. IT WAS AN AMUSING ANECDOTE TO DRAW ATTENTION TO MY CULT POST BUT THANKS TO OYARDE, I PLAN ON INCORPORATING THE ICE CREAM TRUCK INTO MY CULT. HOPEFULLY, DANKE WILL BE MY DRIVER. AFTER DRIVING THE FREE CANDY VAN FOR SO LONG, I IMAGINE HE HAS THE DRIVING CREEPY VEHICLE LIFESKILL MASTERED.DOESN'T SOUND LIKE A GOOD LIFESKILL TO ME, SUZ.
Last edited by Suzanimal; 07-04-2017 at 01:42 PM. Reason: ONE WORD
MR ANIMAL HAS A LIFESKILL TODAY
BEING HUNGOVER, LOL. FOR ONCE, IT'S NOT ME. I WAS A GOOD GIRL LAST NIGHT. MR ANIMAL NEVER SEEMS TO GET DRUNK BUT HE WAS ON A ROLL LAST NIGHT, BLESS HIS HEART.
FATIGUE + BOTTLE OF SCOTCH + ELDERLY NEIGHBORS = BAD HANGOVER
MY ELDERLY NEIGHBORS NEED A LIFESKILL, TOO. BUYING BOOZE. THEY BOUGHT A GALLON OF DRY VERMOUTH, LOL. HE SAID IT WAS A BARGAIN. I SAID IT WAS A LEGACY. I TOLD HIM HIS GREAT GREAT GREAT GRANDCHILDREN WILL BE DRINKING FROM THAT SAME BOTTLE.
MY GRANDMOTHERS LIFE SKILL WAS MAKING GALLONS UPON GALLONS OF MARTINIS WITH THE SAME UNOPENED BOTTLE OF VERMOUTH.MR ANIMAL HAS A LIFESKILL TODAY
BEING HUNGOVER, LOL. FOR ONCE, IT'S NOT ME. I WAS A GOOD GIRL LAST NIGHT. MR ANIMAL NEVER SEEMS TO GET DRUNK BUT HE WAS ON A ROLL LAST NIGHT, BLESS HIS HEART.
FATIGUE + BOTTLE OF SCOTCH + ELDERLY NEIGHBORS = BAD HANGOVER
MY ELDERLY NEIGHBORS NEED A LIFESKILL, TOO. BUYING BOOZE. THEY BOUGHT A GALLON OF DRY VERMOUTH, LOL. HE SAID IT WAS A BARGAIN. I SAID IT WAS A LEGACY. I TOLD HIM HIS GREAT GREAT GREAT GRANDCHILDREN WILL BE DRINKING FROM THAT SAME BOTTLE.
LIFESKILL FOR TODAY ----- WONDER WOMANING!!!
SO POOR, HUNGOVER MR ANIMAL FINALLY ROLLED OUT OF BED AND ASKED FOR A CHEESEBURGER. I DON'T KEEP BREAD AROUND THE HOUSE SO I RAN UP TO KROGER TO BUY SOME BUNS AND THE AUTOMATIC DOOR WASN'T OPENING (IT WAS CRACKED A FEW INCHES, MUST'VE BEEN OFF THE TRACK OR SOMETHING.). THERE WAS THIS OLD LADY STANDING THERE ROLLING HER CART BACK AND FORTH TRYING TO GET IT TO WORK AND I WALKED UP, STUCK MY FINGERS IN THE CRACK, AND FLUNG THE DOOR OPEN. I DID IT REALLY HARD, I DIDN'T REALIZE IT WOULD FLING OPEN LIKE THAT. ANYWAY, A MAN HAD WALKED UP RIGHT WHEN I DID IT AND SAID, "WAY TO GO, WONDER WOMAN". I FLEXED FOR HIM.
THAT MADE MY WEEK. I DON'T GET CALLED WONDER WOMAN NEARLY ENOUGH.
IF YOU DO MORE WONDER WOMAN STUFF, I BET PEOPLE WILL CALL YOU THAT MORE OFTEN.LIFESKILL FOR TODAY ----- WONDER WOMANING!!!
SO POOR, HUNGOVER MR ANIMAL FINALLY ROLLED OUT OF BED AND ASKED FOR A CHEESEBURGER. I DON'T KEEP BREAD AROUND THE HOUSE SO I RAN UP TO KROGER TO BUY SOME BUNS AND THE AUTOMATIC DOOR WASN'T OPENING (IT WAS CRACKED A FEW INCHES, MUST'VE BEEN OFF THE TRACK OR SOMETHING.). THERE WAS THIS OLD LADY STANDING THERE ROLLING HER CART BACK AND FORTH TRYING TO GET IT TO WORK AND I WALKED UP, STUCK MY FINGERS IN THE CRACK, AND FLUNG THE DOOR OPEN. I DID IT REALLY HARD, I DIDN'T REALIZE IT WOULD FLING OPEN LIKE THAT. ANYWAY, A MAN HAD WALKED UP RIGHT WHEN I DID IT AND SAID, "WAY TO GO, WONDER WOMAN". I FLEXED FOR HIM.
THAT MADE MY WEEK. I DON'T GET CALLED WONDER WOMAN NEARLY ENOUGH.
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