That's a very twisted way to describe it. The woman ultimately still has autonomy and she makes the decision whether sex is allowable. The dad and the guy aren't arguing over her right to sexual self-determination. The dad is simply trying to protect her because she is his daughter and it is his duty as a parent to look out for the well-being of his daughter. It's not some kind of negotiation like you make it out to be. It's the dad vetting the guy to make sure he's a good guy because he's the girl's parents and he has a unique perspective as a grown man.
Whatever. Even if it is weird, it's not wrong. Everyone is there of their own free will and volition, so why make a big deal out of it? Why do you care about those women who choose to take part in that? If you don't want to take part in that, you don't have to. Let the Christians be christians. None of what they're doing is evil or wrong. It just seems weird to you. So freaking what?Purity balls imply a father values the flawed concept of virginity more than the daughter, and that the dad has an interest in his daughter's sexuality. They reinforce the idea that women can only be taken advantage of, and that men can only take advantage when it comes to sex. Why are there no purity balls for sons? If a woman wants to pledge to herself not to have sex until she's emotionally and physically ready, I would have less of a problem with the model. Pledging to a father is just weird.
Sure, her upbringing had an effect on her. You can't fix all the parents in society. You can only help the individuals with information. If I see someone who is struggling with a loss or a traumatic event, I take steps to help them get through it. I try to help the individual by helping them help themselves, not by trying to control the thoughts that society has.I personally still find that sexual purity is an important concept for many people, just from my observations on social media. And you're right, I probably do generalize people in this culture, but there's no denying the harm that Elizabeth Smart's upbringing caused to her perceptions of her own rape after the fact.
You think you're taking part in a free market of ideas, but what you're really doing is wasting your time on something that's not going to accomplish anything. In the end, society doesn't give a $#@! about what you think because they're too busy worrying about themselves and what they do than worrying about what everyone else does and thinks like some kind of paranoid schizophrenic who can't stop thinking everyone's conspiring against them to make them hate themselves.
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