The dating scene: manly advice?

[amy31416]

when you have kids and are a responsible parent it pretty much means you can't risk doing any illegal drugs, addictive or not. I mean they take your kids away from you for doing them. Which is one reason why I won't see myself doing any again for at least another 15 years if ever again.

Yeah. I won't do anything even remotely illegal for at least 15 years as well. My kid's worth more to me than having some semblance of fun.

When you're thoughtful enough to think about what's at stake, just no way--I will never give anyone any reason to remove her from me. Maybe I'll try some of these things on my deathbed, but certainly never while she needs me.

[trey4sports]

There are a couple things that really turn women on. Learn to cultivate them.... confidence. Experience. Tension.

[brandon]

I'm not reading 5 pages of posts, but OP I think the only mistake you made was going to a restaurant. It puts way too much pressure on the two of you to have a conversation since there is literally nothing else to do. Better first date would probably be doing something active.... or something that involves copious amounts of boos (if shes into that)

[HVACTech]

I'm in my late twenties, man. I am far too old (and bald, I have anxiety issues on top my introversion. I am not 'uptight'.

[brandon]

Also i $#@!ing lold at dannnos advice of "Stop washing your hair."

[Christian Liberty]

Yeah. I won't do anything even remotely illegal for at least 15 years as well.

Yes you will. Everyone does

[heavenlyboy34]

Yes you will. Everyone does

This^^ 3 felonies a day and all that jazz.

[Christian Liberty]

This^^ 3 felonies a day and all that jazz.

Just out of curiosity, and I may have asked this already, but is that a real stat? Or was it exaggeration to make a point?

[HVACTech]

Just out of curiosity, and I may have asked this already, but is that a real stat? Or was it exaggeration to make a point?

yes.

[Carlybee]

In all seriousness, I kinda miss cocaine. I can do without all those other drugs I tried and or abused in my youth; but I have a fondness for that one.

There's always meth!

[tangent4ronpaul]

Just out of curiosity, and I may have asked this already, but is that a real stat? Or was it exaggeration to make a point?

it's a real stat. The average American commits 3 felonies a day - mostly unknowingly.

It used to be 3 misdemeanors a day and 1-2 felonies a year.

See the direction this gvmt is going?

-t

[tangent4ronpaul]

There's always meth!

Turns you into an anorexic, with deep sunken eyes and teeth that are falling out - AWESOME DRUG BRO!

-t

[oyarde]

(temporarily lifting my self-imposed ban)

Since I am not a real man- I have never actually dated. Not once. I mean, I am pushing 30, how is this even possible? Every single relationship I’ve ever been in came about spontaneously- they "just happened" based on friendships. Yes! I actually have friendships with women despite not being the least bit effeminate or stereotypically girly in my appearance or hobbies- I’m not the "gay best friend" type.

Dating is an alien concept to me. In fact, if I ever reach the point as to where I am desperate enough to creep on dating sites, I might as well commit suicide or become a monk (my general aversion to humans and moderate to low level sex drive makes this sound kinda appealing, but hey! I require some social interaction.

Anyway- last night was my first real 'date', and it was disastrous. It was with a woman I knew through my ex- she has some ties to my ex's inner-circle; a friend of a friend type of deal. Anyway, we started talking recently and decided to hang out.

This 'hangout' chatter had a 'date' like vibe to it from the very beginning. We planned to meet at a restaurant (how conventional). I was anxious about it the whole day, and as soon as I arrived and our eyes met, I felt her nervousness. This was definitely a date.

My nervous system was now in overdrive, and I was in an overly self-conscious state.

"Okay pessimist, just be charming and witty and everything will be ok."

Well, neither one of us could muster enough words to form a coherent sentence. Stupid mundane questions and answers were all we could manage. I was EXTREMELY uncomfortable, and I could tell she was too.

I went to the restroom, and as I was looking in the mirror, I couldn’t help but notice that my receding hairline seemed WAY worse than it actually is. Now I am in borderline freak-out mode, and couldn’t wait to get out the joint.

All that was going through my mind at the point was that she is probably thinking to herself that "this weirdo will probably be completely bald by the time he is 35, gross.”

As I got back to the table, it seemed like an eternity for the food to arrive. Awkward small talk continued.

Finally we ate. Mostly in silence.

At last! The bill.

As were both walking out of the restaurant- in a moment of unrestrained impulse, I instinctively made a sardonic quip. She laughed. FINALLY! The ice breaker. After a moment of lighthearted, sarcastic dialogue, I walked her to her car. I wanted it to continue, I wanted to ask her to do something else, and by her reaction, I think she wanted the night to continue as well. But I just couldn’t whip up enough courage to ask based on the nightmarish experience inside the restaurant. So we went our separate ways.

Neither of us has texted each other since. So I guess that is the end of that.

That makes my head hurt .What is it , exactly that you want to know ?

[specsaregood]

There's always meth!

Never enjoyed that one. No comparison really.

[Carlybee]

Turns you into an anorexic, with deep sunken eyes and teeth that are falling out - AWESOME DRUG BRO!

-t

Don't forget the scabs dude

[tangent4ronpaul]

This whole process is getting soooo convalesced.

Steps:
find a cave and move in.
find a club. If this is inconvenient, go down to Walmart and pick up a baseball bat.
Locate a at least somewhat attractive female.
Hit over head with club.
Drag back to cave by hair.

Simple!

-t

[oyarde]

tried that once when I was young and stupid. It felt like I had just inhaled napalm... YEACH!

-t

Probably , everyone should stay away from napalm .

[oyarde]

eh, why wait? Well for the most part.

My personal "bucket list" of drugs:
X - but I understand you feel like a DOW chemical factory the next day or three afterwords
Ketamine - in the right dose you are supposed to talk to God. It also is used therapeutically with the terminally ill and removes the anxiety about death.
(maybe) Peyote - except the vomiting part...

Seriously death bed? opiates. My mom checked out on morphine. I'm sure it was a good, very comfortable, exit. I tried a couple of puffs of opium once and was really glad it wasn't available. I liked it WAY too much! Never made the hop to H. Didn't want to. It scared me.

-t

Unless you are a very calm person , who really does not give a $#@! about much , I would skip the peyote , and skip the other two , especially the first. I am a very calm person and I pray,but I also expect that God could be pretty busy .

[HVACTech]

Probably , everyone should stay away from napalm .

all day? or just in the morning?

[oyarde]

What is 4Locos?

-t

I think it is a Chicago company .

[specsaregood]

Unless you are a very calm person , who really does not give a $#@! about much , I would skip the peyote , and skip the other two , especially the first. I am a very calm person and I pray,but I also expect that God could be pretty busy .

I rather enjoyed mescaline, course I was a much younger person with less worries and responsibilities and didn't give a $#@! about much...

[oyarde]

In all honesty I have an intense fear of rejection- I'm also extremely inexperienced when it comes to dating. Like I said, LITERALLY all my relationships came from friendships, and all of them but one lasted more than two years. From 19-21 (shortest one), 21-25, then 25-28. (EDIT: off and on between those three years but basically still together).

All of them (excluding some regrettable one-night stand back in college) started out as friendships.

I am out in the wilderness here. Like I said, I am not a real man

Rejection is nothing , I would consider it as opportunity ,I wish most of the jobs I accepted had rejected me , maybe I would have got a better one .

[tangent4ronpaul]

Probably , everyone should stay away from napalm .

IDK - napalm can be fun. Especially around the 4th...

one 4th I was on my cousins farm and I made this huge mushroom shaped fireball.... My aunt said she could clearly see it from her farm 5 miles away... I was something like 8-10yo at the time. I almost blew myself up doing it too!

I miss my country...

-t

[pessimist]

I'm not reading 5 pages of posts, but OP I think the only mistake you made was going to a restaurant. It puts way too much pressure on the two of you to have a conversation since there is literally nothing else to do. Better first date would probably be doing something active.... or something that involves copious amounts of boos (if shes into that)

I think you just nailed it.

It was the PRESSURE of the whole ordeal. I am FINE around people when there is no pressure, when I can relax and "be myself", the moment I am put into an uncomfortable situation I morph into neurotic housewife mode and hide behind some stiff robotic type figure.

As an introvert I am MUCH more comfortable socializing online or through text messaging. I have never struggled with the opposite sex, but now that I am in dating mode, it completely changed the game. It's freaking weird.

[thoughtomator]

Nothing short of some serious LSD will fix a self-conscious loser who at the age of 30 still operates like this:

[oyarde]

On the back of the neck? I've had worse... Heck I had to pull one off my kids eyelid last summer.

I had to cut one out of a buddies navel one cold winter day in Yakima with the tip of a Schrade deer skinning knife, thing was bloated to the size of a dime before he noticed it . I think I was 22 ,I felt old though .Years later , he was 60 miles North of me and still called me to come have a beer , LOL

[Czolgosz]

Be yourself and don't impress. Let the chips fall.

[Nirvikalpa]

Seriously, just text her and ask if she wants to grab a coffee... worst she can say is no, and then you know to move on. Best she can say is yes, and you have a lil' more of a relaxed place to get to know each other better.

[tangent4ronpaul]

I think you just nailed it.

It was the PRESSURE of the whole ordeal. I am FINE around people when there is no pressure, when I can relax and "be myself", the moment I am put into an uncomfortable situation I morph into neurotic housewife mode and hide behind some stiff robotic type figure.

As an introvert I am MUCH more comfortable socializing online or through text messaging. I have never struggled with the opposite sex, but now that I am in dating mode, it completely changed the game. It's freaking weird.

If you are looking for it, you won't find it.

treat it like a game. Expect total rejection and go for it. If it''s a yes - be pleasantly surprised. You might go hunting someplace at least 25 miles away so if it goes bad you don't run into them in the grocery line... Umm, and take a couple of shots before you start...

-t

[tangent4ronpaul]

I had to cut one out of a buddies navel one cold winter day in Yakima with the tip of a Schrade deer skinning knife, thing was bloated to the size of a dime before he noticed it . I think I was 22 ,I felt old though .Years later , he was 60 miles North of me and still called me to come have a beer , LOL

Cover them in Vaseline. They will not be able to breath and will back out on their own.

-t