superschupp
01-09-2008, 01:27 PM
The recent hurricanes and gasoline issues are proof of the existence of a new chemical element.
A major research institution has recently announced the discovery in 2007 of the heaviest element yet known to science. The new element has been named Governmentium. Governmentium (Gv) has one presidential neutron, 100 senatorial neutrons and 435 congressional neutron, giving it an atomic mass of 536. These 536 particles are held together by forces called morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons.
Since Governmentium has no electrons, it is inert. However, it can be detected, because it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact. A minute amount of Governmentium can cause a reaction that would normally take less than a second to take over four days to complete. Governmentium has a normal half-life of 4 years; it does not decay, but instead undergoes a reorganization in which a portion of the senatorial neutrons and congressional neutrons exchange places. In fact, Governmentium's mass will actually increase over time, since each reorganization will cause more morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes.
This characteristic of moron promotion leads some scientists to believe that Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a critical concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as critical morass.
When catalyzed with money, Governmentium becomes Administratium -- an element which radiates just as much energy as Governmentium since it has half as many peons but twice as many morons.
Further research is needed however, early indications are that a small amount of Libertiarium (Lb) can neutralize nearly all of the effects of Governmentium and it's sister element Administratium. Libertiarium is the lightest element known to man, even lighter than Hydrogen. It's existence was theorized in Greece over 2000 years ago, but was only recently confirmed to exist by 56 researchers working in Philadelphia in 1776.
When Governmentium and Libertiarium are mixed the reaction can be violent. To avoid violent revolutionary forces from being unleashed during the mixture of Governmentium and Libertiarium, a small amount of RonPaulium is required.
A major research institution has recently announced the discovery in 2007 of the heaviest element yet known to science. The new element has been named Governmentium. Governmentium (Gv) has one presidential neutron, 100 senatorial neutrons and 435 congressional neutron, giving it an atomic mass of 536. These 536 particles are held together by forces called morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons.
Since Governmentium has no electrons, it is inert. However, it can be detected, because it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact. A minute amount of Governmentium can cause a reaction that would normally take less than a second to take over four days to complete. Governmentium has a normal half-life of 4 years; it does not decay, but instead undergoes a reorganization in which a portion of the senatorial neutrons and congressional neutrons exchange places. In fact, Governmentium's mass will actually increase over time, since each reorganization will cause more morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes.
This characteristic of moron promotion leads some scientists to believe that Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a critical concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as critical morass.
When catalyzed with money, Governmentium becomes Administratium -- an element which radiates just as much energy as Governmentium since it has half as many peons but twice as many morons.
Further research is needed however, early indications are that a small amount of Libertiarium (Lb) can neutralize nearly all of the effects of Governmentium and it's sister element Administratium. Libertiarium is the lightest element known to man, even lighter than Hydrogen. It's existence was theorized in Greece over 2000 years ago, but was only recently confirmed to exist by 56 researchers working in Philadelphia in 1776.
When Governmentium and Libertiarium are mixed the reaction can be violent. To avoid violent revolutionary forces from being unleashed during the mixture of Governmentium and Libertiarium, a small amount of RonPaulium is required.