View Full Version : I Am the Very Model of a Modern Major Candidate

r3volution 3.0
11-19-2014, 04:57 PM
**Youtube "Modern Major-General" if you don't know the tune.

Enjoy :cool:


I am the very model of a modern major candidate,
I've swept away opponents on both upholstery and laminate,
I know the Constitution and on this I won't equivocate,
From Jefferson to Madison on these I need not speculate;
I'm disinclined to worry when my enemies retaliate,
I know how the media likes to slanderize and bloviate,
One more thing you must remember at the voting booth,
I am, incidentally, the only one who tells the truth.

Yet some people tell me I am certainly unelectable,
Their reasoning is devious and easily detectable,
They know that if elected once I never would capitulate,
And in the end I would the special interests eviscerate.

I have a great appeal to both conservative and liberal,
I can bring in everyone without violating principle,
No one has a platform that's more generally delectable,
From Ferguson to Berkeley they find I am acceptable.

Hillary and John McCain Iran they would annihilate,
I object and when I do they tell me that I vacillate,
But I know the people share my view with certainty,
No one wants a war on motives mean and Halliburton-y.

There are disagreements still on matters economical,
The left still holds to theories both irrational and comical,
But I have no doubt that soon the truth it will predominate,
No matter what they think now one day reality will educate.

On the social questions I'm devoted libertarian,
Though my enemies would have you think I'm Rastafarian,
The people of each state should be able to participate,
In elections which determine what they ban and what they regulate,
The alternative is uniform and federal Gargantua,
That is to a people free and heterogeneous anathema.

I'm sowing seeds of liberty which aggregate and animate,
Every single day I plead and argue and evangelate,
I will never stop until the opposition is eradicate,
I am the very model of a modern major candidate.

11-19-2014, 05:02 PM
Good job!

11-19-2014, 05:29 PM
A modern major general

election candidate...

But are the parties perfectly permutated to prevent the pursuance of general election perfection in the primaries?

11-19-2014, 06:12 PM
Nice job!

I did my best to sing this properly, I wasn't so impressive :)

Come election season this would make a brilliant viral video.

11-19-2014, 06:14 PM

Occam's Banana
11-19-2014, 06:25 PM
Boy! Rap music sure has changed since the 19th century ...



11-19-2014, 06:31 PM
Great job..rhyme and rhythm is spot on