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View Full Version : McCain calls for invasion of Hong Kong [SATIRE]




jdmyprez_deo_vindice
06-10-2013, 07:27 PM
http://dailycurrant.com/2013/06/10/john-mccain-calls-for-invasion-of-hong-kong/


U.S. Senator John McCain called for the invasion of Hong Kong today in response to recent leaks about secret surveillance programs.

In an interview with BBC World News, the hawkish Republican said that by hosting the leaker, Edward Snowden, Hong Kong has proven itself to be an enemy of the United States.

"Either you're with us or you're against us," McCain explained to anchor Freddie Lyon, "and clearly the nation of Hong Kong is against us. By harboring this known cybercriminal they pose a clear and present danger to the American people.

"I don't want to hear about extradition or rendition or any of that nonsense. This man is a traitor and if we don't get him within 24 hours I say we need to start bombing the hell out of Hong Kong.

"Luckily this is a tiny country with no real military to speak of. I don't expect any resistance. We could probably destroy their infrastructure and occupy the entire country by the end of the week."


The Chinese Connection
Hong Kong is a former British colony that is now a Special Administrative Region of China. Although it has wide autonomy in domestic matters, defense and foreign affairs are the province of China - which has the world's second most powerful military after the United States.

John McCain, however, has a long history of advocating greater U.S. military involvement abroad, vociferously supporting the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan and calling for airstrikes in Syria.

The former 2008 presidential candidate has also been a vocal critic of China, but his willingness to use military force against a protectorate of Beijing is nevertheless a surprise to many. Yet in the interview McCain was unapologetic and said the U.S. shouldn't stop at an invasion.

"After we take Hong Kong and capture Snowden, we need to seriously think about annexing the territory,' he continued, "they have a world class port, a great stockmarket, and the best dim sum in the world. I don't know why China should have all of that and not us.

"If we had a military base in Hong Kong we could keep a close eye on what the Chinese are up to. We could station missiles that would be only minutes away from Beijing, Shanghai, Guangzhou, Tianjin - all the major cities. And finally we'd have a place where we could move the Guantanamo inmates.

"Sure it will be a difficult adjustment at first. But everyone already speaks English, so half our work is done. In time Hong Kongers will come to love our rule - just like the Hawaiians, the Filipinos, and the Afghans."

John McCain has served as a senator from Arizona since 1987. He was the Republican candidate for president in 2008, a contest he lost to Barack Obama.

BuddyRey
06-10-2013, 07:30 PM
He probably just wants a chance to relive his old army days, fighting in the Opium Wars.

enhanced_deficit
06-10-2013, 07:31 PM
"Either you're with us or you're against us," McCain explained to anchor Freddie Lyon

Is McCain with or against Al Qaeda?

VoluntaryAmerican
06-10-2013, 07:33 PM
This isn't that unbelievable, but satire nonetheless.

Meh.. but I still don't find it that funny considering people are really calling Snowden a traitor.

69360
06-10-2013, 07:33 PM
That site is like the onion, no?

ronpaulfollower999
06-10-2013, 07:33 PM
The currant is a satire site. ;)

ronpaulfollower999
06-10-2013, 07:33 PM
But I believed it at first.

Uriel999
06-10-2013, 07:34 PM
that has to be a joke. I mean, I am sure McCain thinks that exactly, but he's too senile to say it so clearly.

jdmyprez_deo_vindice
06-10-2013, 07:34 PM
It is really damn sad when our country and leaders suck so damn much that satire appears to be legit reporting. Sorry guys, had no idea this was a satire site.

cajuncocoa
06-10-2013, 07:38 PM
https://encrypted-tbn3.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQm9NNqj0W8-tT1SlDN66AUVXIyGsaF7OoxoeepU0yTQDgJN8nucA

VoluntaryAmerican
06-10-2013, 07:43 PM
I knew it was fake because the newspaper/AP style was so bad... :D

cajuncocoa
06-10-2013, 07:44 PM
It is really damn sad when our country and leaders suck so damn much that satire appears to be legit reporting. Sorry guys, had no idea this was a satire site.

It's totally believable! Give him a day or two, he will probably do this for real.

Warlord
06-10-2013, 07:47 PM
lol @ mods having to put [SATIRE]

jdmyprez_deo_vindice
06-10-2013, 07:49 PM
lol @ mods having to put [SATIRE]

Yeah, that was me. Sadly, I posted this on my Facebook as well and almost everyone believed it was real because they would expect this nonsense from McCain.

TaftFan
06-10-2013, 07:49 PM
This isn't unrealistic.