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View Full Version : Fox News denounces Ron Paul "Tea Party" (spoof)




qwerty
11-25-2007, 02:45 AM
Fox News today criticized an event to be held next month for the benefit of the Ron Paul GOP primary campaign.

Bill O'Reilly, host of the Fox News show "The O'Reilly Factor," fired the opening salvo.

"With national polls showing campaign spoiler wannabe Ron Paul at 4%, the Paulites (derogatory name for Ron Paul supporters) are desperately trying to raise more money for his flagging campaign," O'Reilly belched forth. "But in the name of free speech they should just shut up, because this thing is going to fail just like the November 5th fund-raising conspiracy."

The November 5th event O'Reilly referred to was deemed a failure by many Paul supporters, as it missed its fund-raising goal by almost one dollar. The goal had been $4,285,597.00, but only $4,285,596.10 was raised. As a result, the November 5th fund-raising failure has inspired the Paul supporters to try even harder next month during the planned "Tea Party '07" event.

O'Reilly also raised the possibility that Ron Paul does not actually exist, a claim Fox News has made before. "Even physicists do not know for sure whether Ron Paul exists," O'Reilly flatulated. "So ask yourself this question: Do I really want to throw my GOP primary vote away on a candidate that might not even exist?"

Ron Paul campaign spokesman Jesse Benton refused to confirm or deny the existence of Dr. Paul, citing the delicacy of current media physics, but did admit that the November 5th event came up short.

"Perhaps we shouldn't have distanced ourselves from the grassroots supporters quite so much," Benton said. "But we intend to act differently for the next grassroots fund-raising event on December 16th (date of the Tea Party '07 event). We are currently looking at ways to cover a potential 90 cent shortfall."

Joshua Finkelstein, an emeritus professor of political science who taught for 35 years at Pokeewah University in Michigan's upper peninsula, and who recently learned about the Tea Party '07 event, thinks that the Tea Party will meet its goal.

"After having been stung by defeat on November 5th, and suffering withering criticism from a fair and balanced Fox News network, I think the Paul supporters will dig a little deeper under the sofa cushions on December 16th," Finkelstein said.

http://www.thespoof.com/news/spoof.cfm?headline=s2i27170

travismofo
11-25-2007, 02:54 AM
Fox reports Ron Paul doesn't exist HAH!

http://www.thespoof.com/news/spoof.cfm?headline=s2i26473

afn but made me laugh my butt off

chipvogel
11-25-2007, 03:00 AM
Refusing to report on Ron Paul is the same as denying his existents isn't it?