Hilarious satire on reddit: STOP THE KOCH BROTHERS. They are trying to end the War on Drug

[emazur]

As you may know, reddit is dominated by leftist liberal losers and an anti-Koch article appears on the front page every few days, especially now with this Wisconsin shit going on. Kochs aren't perfect but this is some of the best satire I've read in a while:

http://www.reddit.com/r/politics/comments/frrth/stop_the_koch_brothers_they_are_trying_to_end_the/
The KOCH brothers must be stopped. They gave $40K to Scott Walker, the MAX allowed by state law. That's small potatoes compared to the $100+ million they give to other organizations. These organizations will terrify you. If the anti-union thing weren't enough, here are bigger and better reasons to stop the evil Kochs. They are trying to:

1. decriminalize drugs,
2. legalize gay marriage,
3. repeal the Patriot Act,
4. end the police state,
5. cut defense spending.

Who hates the police? Only the criminals using drugs, amirite? We need the Patriot Act to allow government to go through our emails and tap our phones to catch people who smoke marijuana and put them in prison. Oh, it's also good for terrorists.

Wikipedia shows Koch Family Foundations supporting causes like:

1. CATO Institute
2. Reason Foundation
3. cancer research ($150 million to M.I.T. - STOP THEM! KEEP CANCER ALIVE!)
4. ballet (because seriously: FUCK. THAT. SHIT.)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Koch_Family_Foundations

The Kochs basically give a TON of money (millions of dollars) to the CATO Institute. Scott Walker, $40K? HAH! These CATO people are the REAL problem. They want to end the War on Drugs. Insane, right? We know that the War on Drugs keeps us SAFE from Mexicans and keeps all that violence on their side of the fence. More than 30,000 Mexicans killed as of December! Thank God Mexican lives don't count as human lives. Our government is doing a good, no, a great job protecting us and seriously, who cares about brown people or should I say non-people? HAHAHA! Public unions are good, government is good, and government protects us from drugs and brown people. The Kochs want to end all that. Look, as far back as 1989 CATO has been trying to decriminalize drugs. Don't worry, nobody listens to them because they are INSANE.

http://www.cato.org/pub_display.php?pub_id=981

CATO also rejects the Patriot Act. How can you hate the Patriot Act? Are you not American? They made it easy for you to understand by putting the word "Patriot" in the legislation. That means you should vote YES. Giving up our civil liberties is not a big deal. We need our government. Whether it's Obama or Bush, we can all agree that the TSA is really good at what they do. God, those patdowns feel SOOOO good.

http://www.cato.org/pub_display.php?pub_id=10599

The Kochs also support Reason Foundation. You don't know about that? Let me tell you. Basically, REASON Foundation is a bunch of cop haters. Last month, they did a "news" (as if we wanna know!) story on three cops that beat up an unarmed black kid. In the aftermath, the cops were suspended, sat around doing nothing and got paid (like that's a bad thing!). I don't know about you, but that puts a smile on my face for four reasons:

1. I hate black people,
2. I love the police,
3. I love it when police beat up black people for no reason,
4. I love that it comes out of taxpayers' money, because it's not like it's really my money.

The Kochs are trying to end this. The Kochs must be stopped.

http://reason.com/archives/2011/01/24/a-beating-in-pittsburgh

CATO trying to cut defense spending:

http://www.cato-at-liberty.org/how-to-cut-military-spending/

Gay marriage. YUCK. That's just obvious. If the KOCH Brothers have their way, there will be ***** getting married left and right. Here's another scary thought: gays raising children.

http://www.cato.org/pub_display.php?pub_id=6379

Here are some videos from Glenn Greenwald, one of those "gays." He writes for the liberal Salon.com, but don't let that fool you. He's in the Koch Brothers' pocket. Here are some videos to prove my point:

Here's Glenn Greenwald talking about drug-decriminalization at REASON:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kjuvXdqKM0M&feature=related

Yeah, he's that Glenn Greenwald that also defends WikiLeaks.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XInz4i6AV8M

If there's one thing I know about billionaires, it's that they only care about money. Bill Gates, Warren Buffett and George Soros. They aren't fooling me. Bill Gates isn't fooling me with his vaccination campaign in Africa. He's just trying to make African children live longer so they will buy more copies of Windows. Wow. Not even trying to hide it.

Now, I don't know why the KOCH brothers want gay people to have the right to marry. Everybody knows marriage is for a man and a woman. Even Obama believes that. Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve amirite? I haven't figured out the angle, yet. Maybe it's like this:

1. legalize drugs
2. legalize gay marriage
3. sell drugs, oil and Koch napkins to gays at their weddings
4. ????
5. PROFIT$

I don't know exactly how it would work, but we can all agree that they're evil. Think about it. CATO and REASON are the only institutions OPENLY advocating these positions. Who would do such a thing? Have they no shame? Minority opinions MUST BE SILENCED.

Anyway, we must reject everything that the KOCH brothers do in Wisconsin and around the country. We will succeed as long as we stick to the GROUP-&-THINK.

YES WE CAN. You're either with us or against us.

[teacherone]

holy shit that is epic!

[reillym]

And... it's refuted a few posts down...

You're basing a lot of assumption on their positions solely on the CATO and a few other cherry picked organizations; the bigger picture of the Koch's is that they fund a lot of other organizations that are actively :

Anti Global Warming- Anti Union- Anti Gay Marriage- Anti Welfare- Pro corporate privatization of social security, medicare-

The latest example was American for Prosperity, a Koch front group, that bussed in Tea party people to counter protest union workers in Wisconsin.

The 'climate gate' faux scandal was used by Americans for Prosperity, the Heritage Foundation, and the Cato Institute, as a front for global warming denial.

I mean honestly, all I really have to point out is that the Tea Party movement is hugely funded by the Kochs bros, and their fronts organizations.

Whatever the policy positions of the Koch's, they helped build a group of people that I think are fundamentally against equality and justice in America. Whatever the Tea Party is, it isn't progressive... and it isn't the things you've listed above... that's for fucking sure.

Remember also that these institutes and organizations don't always work towards what they say they are for. We've seen actively that Freedom Works, the Heritage Foundation, and the Cato institute astro turf issues, and essentially act against their own libertarian philosophy... and instead act typically conservative.


Lol.

[specsaregood]

Anti Global Warming- Anti Union- Anti Gay Marriage- Anti Welfare- Pro corporate privatization of social security, medicare-
...
Whatever the Tea Party is, it isn't progressive... and it isn't the things you've listed above... that's for fucking sure.


Oh noes! The horror!

[Sentient Void]

Wow, this was *epic* SHARED.

[Inflation]

The 'climate gate' faux scandal was used by Americans for Prosperity, the Heritage Foundation, and the Cato Institute, as a front for global warming denial.

Climategate is one word. And you don't need to put it in quotes, as if that helps you get in some kind of extra little snarky dig.

Reading the blatantly fudged source code released by the Climategate whistleblower is probably beyond your abilities, but here is an article that can help you understand what all the fuss was about:

Climategate: Why it matters (http://www.theregister.co.uk/2009/11/30/crugate_analysis/)
Reading the Climategate archive is a bit like discovering that Professional Wrestling is rigged. You mean, it is? Really?

The archive - a carefully curated 160MB collection of source code, emails and other documents from the internal network of the Climatic Research Unit at the University of East Anglia - provides grim confirmation for critics of climate science. But it also raises far more troubling questions.

Perhaps the real scandal is the dependence of media and politicians on their academics' work - an ask-no-questions approach that saw them surrender much of their power, and ultimately authority. This doesn't absolve the CRU crew of the charges, but might put it into a better context.

After a week of scrutiny of the emails, attention is now turning to the programming source code. Three quarters of the material released is the work of the academics, much of which they had jealously guarded. This includes a version of the world's most cited and respected temperature record - HADCRUT - and a number of surveys which featured prominently in the reports of the UN's climate change panel, the IPCC. The actors here shaped the UN reports, and ultimately - because no politician dare contradict the 'science' - shaped global policy.

The allegations over the past week are fourfold: that climate scientists controlled the publishing process to discredit opposing views and further their own theory; they manipulated data to make recent temperature trends look anomalous; they withheld and destroyed data they should have released as good scientific practice, and they were generally beastly about people who criticised their work.

Now, I know you are too stubborn to accept this, so here are some extra articles that directly indicate the massive importance of Climategate.

BTW, they are the FIRST RESULTS ON GOOGLE:



Climategate: the final nail in the coffin of 'Anthropogenic Global Warming'? (http://blogs.telegraph.co.uk/news/jamesdelingpole/100017393/climategate-the-final-nail-in-the-coffin-of-anthropogenic-global-warming/)
f you own any shares in alternative energy companies I should start dumping them NOW. The conspiracy behind the Anthropogenic Global Warming myth (aka AGW; aka ManBearPig) has been suddenly, brutally and quite deliciously exposed after a hacker broke into the computers at the University of East Anglia’s Climate Research Unit (aka CRU) and released 61 megabytes of confidential files onto the internet. (Hat tip: Watts Up With That)

When you read some of those files – including 1079 emails and 72 documents – you realise just why the boffins at CRU might have preferred to keep them confidential. As Andrew Bolt puts it, this scandal could well be “the greatest in modern science”.


Climate change: this is the worst scientific scandal of our generation (http://www.telegraph.co.uk/comment/columnists/christopherbooker/6679082/Climate-change-this-is-the-worst-scientific-scandal-of-our-generation.html)
The reason why even the Guardian's George Monbiot has expressed total shock and dismay at the picture revealed by the documents is that their authors are not just any old bunch of academics. Their importance cannot be overestimated, What we are looking at here is the small group of scientists who have for years been more influential in driving the worldwide alarm over global warming than any others, not least through the role they play at the heart of the UN's Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change (IPCC).



BTW, none of this means I endorse the Kochtopus. the Stato Institute and Heritage Foundation are our frenemies. They do help counter the liberals influence, but at what cost?

[Thomas]

bump!