BuddyRey
02-13-2009, 09:25 PM
There's an author at Thespoof.com who goes by the pen name "Fatima Guillermo Chen", whose stuff I just now discovered. This is some of the most gut-bustingly political satire that I've ever read (much funnier than Stewart and Colbert), and it all seems to be from an unabashedly libertarian point of view. Case in point, this hypothetical reenactment of a past interview, in which Alex Jones grills Texas Governor Rick Perry on the issues:
http://www.thespoof.com/magazine/index.cfm?eID=2436
"AUSTIN-Radio talk show host Alex Jones has sparked quite a bit of controversy lately with high profile interviews like the one last week with country legend Willie Nelson who made headlines after revealing his doubts concerning the official story of the 9-11 tragedy.
Now, on the heels of that comes yet another provocative interview, this time with seated Texas Governor Rick Perry.
On Alex's Saturday night show, in a live telephone interview, the two rivals sparred and things got rather heated as Jones pressed the politician on a number of sensitive topics. The Governor, taken somewhat off-guard, struggled to hold his own but in the end…well? You be the judge.
The following is a transcript of the Saturday night interview courtesy of Genesis Communications Network…
JONES: Anthony, Bob, Ivy, Sam, William, Ian, Mary, Robert, Barbara, Henry, Phillip, Dave, Edmond, Vicki, Sue, Gerald and Tom I promise I'll get to all of your calls in the last five minutes of the show but first I want to introduce our guest. He's only here for this very short segment. He's understandably a very busy man running the affairs of the great state of Texas and although we don't see eye to eye on hardly any issue, it's still an honor to have him take time out from his busy schedule to be with us tonight. So without further adieu, I'd like to welcome Governor Rick Perry to the show. Governor Perry thank you for agreeing to come on with us.
PERRY: My pleasure. Thank you for having me, Larry.
JONES: Uh…the name is Alex, Governor.
PERRY: Alex? You mean this isn't the Larry King Show?
JONES: No it isn't, Governor. This is the Alex Jones Show. You're live on the air with Alex Jones.
PERRY: Oh, boy. Did I ever get the wrong number.
JONES: Actually, we called you, sir.
PERRY: Oh, well that explains it. Anyway. How can I help you, Larry?
JONES: Uh…O.K., Governor we only have a short amount of time here and there are so many questions I have to ask so I'm going to cut to the chase. For months I've been called a conspiracy theorist for citing the existence of the Trans-Texas corridor. Now I have it on good authority that this project does in fact exist and that you are directly involved in…
PERRY: Now let me stop you right there, Larry! I don't know of this "Trans-Sexist" project that you speak of but I will say this: Whatever a man does in the privacy of his own home is his business. If that means wearing women's clothing then…
JONES: Not "Trans-SEXIST"! "Trans-TEXAS"! A three thousand plus mile, ten lane highway linking Mexico to Canada. Now I'm looking at official Tex-DOT documents that specifically link you to…
PERRY: Tex WHAT?
JONES: Tex-DOT. The Texas Department of Transportation.
PERRY: Is there really such a thing?
JONES: Of course there is!
PERRY: Well I can tell you for sure if you just give me one minute. I just happen to have a pull-out brochure that my aides gave me when I took office. It lists all the departments and agencies that I'm in charge of. Let me see…Texas Rangers, Texas Department of Motor Vehicles…oh here it is. What do you know we do have…oh, wait a minute…it says right here: "It doesn't exist"
JONES: Doesn't exist? Then how do you account for your name appearing on page after page of …
PERRY: Are you sure you've got the right Rick Perry? You know a lot of people get me confused with the lead guitarist for Aerosmith. I love that song (singing) "Livin' on the edge! You can't help yourself from faaallling!" I wanted to make that my campaign song but my staffers said it wasn't "country" enough for Texas.
JONES: (sighs) O.K, let's shift gears here. You say that Tex-DOT doesn't exist. You apparently think that a lot of things don't exist. When you came out to endorse Rudy Giuliani for President you said you did so because there wasn't another Texan running. What about Ron Paul? Apparently you think he doesn't exist either?
PERRY: Ron who?
JONES: Ron Paul! The congressman from the 14th District
PERRY: Isn't he the guy who invented the electric guitar?
JONES: I think you're thinking of Les Paul.
PERRY: Now there's a great Texan.
JONES: Actually I believe Les Paul is from Tennessee, Governor.
PERRY: Well there's your problem right there. I mean we don't need some guy from Tennessee coming out here to try and run things for us Texans.
JONES: I'm not talking about…O.K. never mind. Let's shift gears once again. In 2007 you flew to Instanbul Turkey to attend a Bilderberg meeting in direct violation of the Logan Act which specifically states that "any citizen of the United States, wherever he may be, who, without authority of the United States, directly or indirectly commences or carries on any correspondence or intercourse with any foreign government or any officer or agent thereof, with intent to influence the measures or conduct of any foreign government or of any officer or agent thereof, in relation to any disputes or controversies with the United States, or to defeat the measures of the United States, shall be fined under this title or imprisoned not more than three years, or both."
PERRY: Now wait a minute! I know something of the Logan Act and from my recollection it deals specifically with the maximum age a person can reach before he is executed. I think that age is 39 if memory serves.
JONES: Are you talking about "Logan's Run"?
PERRY: Aren't you?
JONES: No! I'm not!
PERRY: You know you sure ask a lot of questions. How about I ask you a question?
JONES: Go right ahead.
PERRY: What do you think of my hair? People say I've got the best hair in government. What do you think?
JONES: Your hair? You're on the phone, Governor. I can't see your hair.
PERRY: O.K., I'll put the phone down. (faintly in the background) Can you see it now?
JONES: NO! O.K., let's back up a minute. Did you or did you not fly to Turkey?
PERRY: You know I'm not really sure if turkey's fly or not. I think they do but just not very well.
JONES: Did you attend a Bilderberg meeting in Istanbul?
PERRY: I don't know of any Bildererg meeting but I did attend a "Build-A-Bear" workshop at the Barton Creek mall with my daughter. Is that what you're thinking of?
JONES: Look, Governor we are almost out of time and I haven't got a straight answer out of you yet. So I'm going to try a different approach. Let's do a little word association. I'll throw out some key topics and you answer with the first thing that pops into your head. Ready?
PERRY: Fire away!
JONES: Taxes?
PERRY: The Lone Star State! Greatest state in the union.
JONES: Come on, Governor! Be serious!
PERRY: What's the matter? You got something against Texas?
JONES: Let's try this again. Illegal Immigration?
PERRY: Good for the nation!
JONES: Vaccines?
PERRY: By all means!
JONES: Constitution?
PERRY: Noise Pollution!
JONES: Trans-Texas Corridor?
PERRY: People like 'em. Let's build more!
JONES: (sighs) Oh, boy. Unfortunately we are all out of time but I'd like to have you back in the future so we can try to get to the bottom of some of these issues.
PERRY: Anytime, Larry!"
And that's the way it went. Perhaps Alex should have asked the Governor the question that is on all of our minds: "Do you have a conscience, Governor Perry"? But actually…I think deep down, we all know the answer to that: "It doesn't exist"!"
Or this short-but-sweet potshot at Marvel Comics, and concurrent playful sendup of two of the freedom movement's favorite figureheads:
http://www.thespoof.com/news/spoof.cfm?headline=s4i30898
"SAN DIEGO - Marvel Comics announced last December that it was joining forces with the United Nations to bolster the world organization's lack-luster image by producing "free" comic books depicting popular superheroes working in cooperation with the UN Security Council to resolve bloody international conflicts (unless perpetrated by the State of Israel) and rid the world of disease.
Today, at a press conference held during day six of the 2008 Comic-Con convention (the largest comic book and popular arts convention in the world), Marvel spokesperson Eugene Echs revealed more details about the forthcoming project.
"We will be introducing two new "Super Villains" to the "Marvel Universe" this summer" said Echs "and just as the United Nations is a real organization, we have drawn our inspiration for their adversaries from real life examples as well"
Although no "real" names of whom these examples were was revealed, it became rather obvious once the descriptions of the villains was underway.
First there's "Tex Truther" (obviously an homage to DC Comic's Lex Luther). Tex was once a mild mannered political talk show host from Austin Texas named "Jonas Alexander" who, after sustaining a massive electrical shock resulting from the surge caused by a lightning bolt striking his broadcast tower, is transformed into a crazed eyed, red skinned gargantua whose bulging chest and biceps gouge and rip away at his shirt.
Surging with wrath against "world government", Tex Truther uses thunderous rants against his opponents. His high pitched howls can be "very hard on the ears" and can, in some cases, even "bring down walls"!
The second of these new villains is a renegade Congressman who, after being exposed to the power of a sacred piece of parchment known as the "United States Constitution", becomes "Dr. No": a tax slashing political outsider who thwarts the efforts of globalists by opposing legislation that would put the nation's interest's in the hand's of foreign powers.
"These two villains will be at the center of the conflicts that the United Nation contends with for at least the first two issues" explains Echs. "Their real life counterparts have always been a thorn in the side of the United Nations and I suspect these fictional versions will prove to be just as menacing. Much in the way "Dr. Doom" is to the "Fantastic Four".
In addition to the new super villain line-up, Echs also revealed that Marvel was planning to give a "face lift" to many of their existing heroes.
"Spiderman" will now be "Spider-Goatman" , a nod to scientific advances in genetic cross-species research.
"Captain America" will now be "Captain Amero" and will trade in his red white and blue shield for one bearing the UN crest.
"We want to do away with antiquated notions of truth, justice and the American way" explains Echs "and replace them with more of a forward thinking, global friendly kind of attitude"
"We will also be making our characters more "eco-conscious" Echs goes on to explain "For instance; Ghost Rider will no longer be drawn with a flaming skull in order to cut down on CO2 emissions and will now ride a bicycle instead of a motorcycle to reduce the size of his carbon footprint".
Some story ideas were also revealed centering around the predominant theme of "Man-Made Global Warming" and will pit heroes against such serious crisis as second hand smoke, outdoor BBQ's and flatulating cows."
Thespoof.com offers no way to contact authors directly, but I'm hoping that this brilliant and creative person reads these forums and will "out" herself, so that I may shower her with praise! :D
http://www.thespoof.com/magazine/index.cfm?eID=2436
"AUSTIN-Radio talk show host Alex Jones has sparked quite a bit of controversy lately with high profile interviews like the one last week with country legend Willie Nelson who made headlines after revealing his doubts concerning the official story of the 9-11 tragedy.
Now, on the heels of that comes yet another provocative interview, this time with seated Texas Governor Rick Perry.
On Alex's Saturday night show, in a live telephone interview, the two rivals sparred and things got rather heated as Jones pressed the politician on a number of sensitive topics. The Governor, taken somewhat off-guard, struggled to hold his own but in the end…well? You be the judge.
The following is a transcript of the Saturday night interview courtesy of Genesis Communications Network…
JONES: Anthony, Bob, Ivy, Sam, William, Ian, Mary, Robert, Barbara, Henry, Phillip, Dave, Edmond, Vicki, Sue, Gerald and Tom I promise I'll get to all of your calls in the last five minutes of the show but first I want to introduce our guest. He's only here for this very short segment. He's understandably a very busy man running the affairs of the great state of Texas and although we don't see eye to eye on hardly any issue, it's still an honor to have him take time out from his busy schedule to be with us tonight. So without further adieu, I'd like to welcome Governor Rick Perry to the show. Governor Perry thank you for agreeing to come on with us.
PERRY: My pleasure. Thank you for having me, Larry.
JONES: Uh…the name is Alex, Governor.
PERRY: Alex? You mean this isn't the Larry King Show?
JONES: No it isn't, Governor. This is the Alex Jones Show. You're live on the air with Alex Jones.
PERRY: Oh, boy. Did I ever get the wrong number.
JONES: Actually, we called you, sir.
PERRY: Oh, well that explains it. Anyway. How can I help you, Larry?
JONES: Uh…O.K., Governor we only have a short amount of time here and there are so many questions I have to ask so I'm going to cut to the chase. For months I've been called a conspiracy theorist for citing the existence of the Trans-Texas corridor. Now I have it on good authority that this project does in fact exist and that you are directly involved in…
PERRY: Now let me stop you right there, Larry! I don't know of this "Trans-Sexist" project that you speak of but I will say this: Whatever a man does in the privacy of his own home is his business. If that means wearing women's clothing then…
JONES: Not "Trans-SEXIST"! "Trans-TEXAS"! A three thousand plus mile, ten lane highway linking Mexico to Canada. Now I'm looking at official Tex-DOT documents that specifically link you to…
PERRY: Tex WHAT?
JONES: Tex-DOT. The Texas Department of Transportation.
PERRY: Is there really such a thing?
JONES: Of course there is!
PERRY: Well I can tell you for sure if you just give me one minute. I just happen to have a pull-out brochure that my aides gave me when I took office. It lists all the departments and agencies that I'm in charge of. Let me see…Texas Rangers, Texas Department of Motor Vehicles…oh here it is. What do you know we do have…oh, wait a minute…it says right here: "It doesn't exist"
JONES: Doesn't exist? Then how do you account for your name appearing on page after page of …
PERRY: Are you sure you've got the right Rick Perry? You know a lot of people get me confused with the lead guitarist for Aerosmith. I love that song (singing) "Livin' on the edge! You can't help yourself from faaallling!" I wanted to make that my campaign song but my staffers said it wasn't "country" enough for Texas.
JONES: (sighs) O.K, let's shift gears here. You say that Tex-DOT doesn't exist. You apparently think that a lot of things don't exist. When you came out to endorse Rudy Giuliani for President you said you did so because there wasn't another Texan running. What about Ron Paul? Apparently you think he doesn't exist either?
PERRY: Ron who?
JONES: Ron Paul! The congressman from the 14th District
PERRY: Isn't he the guy who invented the electric guitar?
JONES: I think you're thinking of Les Paul.
PERRY: Now there's a great Texan.
JONES: Actually I believe Les Paul is from Tennessee, Governor.
PERRY: Well there's your problem right there. I mean we don't need some guy from Tennessee coming out here to try and run things for us Texans.
JONES: I'm not talking about…O.K. never mind. Let's shift gears once again. In 2007 you flew to Instanbul Turkey to attend a Bilderberg meeting in direct violation of the Logan Act which specifically states that "any citizen of the United States, wherever he may be, who, without authority of the United States, directly or indirectly commences or carries on any correspondence or intercourse with any foreign government or any officer or agent thereof, with intent to influence the measures or conduct of any foreign government or of any officer or agent thereof, in relation to any disputes or controversies with the United States, or to defeat the measures of the United States, shall be fined under this title or imprisoned not more than three years, or both."
PERRY: Now wait a minute! I know something of the Logan Act and from my recollection it deals specifically with the maximum age a person can reach before he is executed. I think that age is 39 if memory serves.
JONES: Are you talking about "Logan's Run"?
PERRY: Aren't you?
JONES: No! I'm not!
PERRY: You know you sure ask a lot of questions. How about I ask you a question?
JONES: Go right ahead.
PERRY: What do you think of my hair? People say I've got the best hair in government. What do you think?
JONES: Your hair? You're on the phone, Governor. I can't see your hair.
PERRY: O.K., I'll put the phone down. (faintly in the background) Can you see it now?
JONES: NO! O.K., let's back up a minute. Did you or did you not fly to Turkey?
PERRY: You know I'm not really sure if turkey's fly or not. I think they do but just not very well.
JONES: Did you attend a Bilderberg meeting in Istanbul?
PERRY: I don't know of any Bildererg meeting but I did attend a "Build-A-Bear" workshop at the Barton Creek mall with my daughter. Is that what you're thinking of?
JONES: Look, Governor we are almost out of time and I haven't got a straight answer out of you yet. So I'm going to try a different approach. Let's do a little word association. I'll throw out some key topics and you answer with the first thing that pops into your head. Ready?
PERRY: Fire away!
JONES: Taxes?
PERRY: The Lone Star State! Greatest state in the union.
JONES: Come on, Governor! Be serious!
PERRY: What's the matter? You got something against Texas?
JONES: Let's try this again. Illegal Immigration?
PERRY: Good for the nation!
JONES: Vaccines?
PERRY: By all means!
JONES: Constitution?
PERRY: Noise Pollution!
JONES: Trans-Texas Corridor?
PERRY: People like 'em. Let's build more!
JONES: (sighs) Oh, boy. Unfortunately we are all out of time but I'd like to have you back in the future so we can try to get to the bottom of some of these issues.
PERRY: Anytime, Larry!"
And that's the way it went. Perhaps Alex should have asked the Governor the question that is on all of our minds: "Do you have a conscience, Governor Perry"? But actually…I think deep down, we all know the answer to that: "It doesn't exist"!"
Or this short-but-sweet potshot at Marvel Comics, and concurrent playful sendup of two of the freedom movement's favorite figureheads:
http://www.thespoof.com/news/spoof.cfm?headline=s4i30898
"SAN DIEGO - Marvel Comics announced last December that it was joining forces with the United Nations to bolster the world organization's lack-luster image by producing "free" comic books depicting popular superheroes working in cooperation with the UN Security Council to resolve bloody international conflicts (unless perpetrated by the State of Israel) and rid the world of disease.
Today, at a press conference held during day six of the 2008 Comic-Con convention (the largest comic book and popular arts convention in the world), Marvel spokesperson Eugene Echs revealed more details about the forthcoming project.
"We will be introducing two new "Super Villains" to the "Marvel Universe" this summer" said Echs "and just as the United Nations is a real organization, we have drawn our inspiration for their adversaries from real life examples as well"
Although no "real" names of whom these examples were was revealed, it became rather obvious once the descriptions of the villains was underway.
First there's "Tex Truther" (obviously an homage to DC Comic's Lex Luther). Tex was once a mild mannered political talk show host from Austin Texas named "Jonas Alexander" who, after sustaining a massive electrical shock resulting from the surge caused by a lightning bolt striking his broadcast tower, is transformed into a crazed eyed, red skinned gargantua whose bulging chest and biceps gouge and rip away at his shirt.
Surging with wrath against "world government", Tex Truther uses thunderous rants against his opponents. His high pitched howls can be "very hard on the ears" and can, in some cases, even "bring down walls"!
The second of these new villains is a renegade Congressman who, after being exposed to the power of a sacred piece of parchment known as the "United States Constitution", becomes "Dr. No": a tax slashing political outsider who thwarts the efforts of globalists by opposing legislation that would put the nation's interest's in the hand's of foreign powers.
"These two villains will be at the center of the conflicts that the United Nation contends with for at least the first two issues" explains Echs. "Their real life counterparts have always been a thorn in the side of the United Nations and I suspect these fictional versions will prove to be just as menacing. Much in the way "Dr. Doom" is to the "Fantastic Four".
In addition to the new super villain line-up, Echs also revealed that Marvel was planning to give a "face lift" to many of their existing heroes.
"Spiderman" will now be "Spider-Goatman" , a nod to scientific advances in genetic cross-species research.
"Captain America" will now be "Captain Amero" and will trade in his red white and blue shield for one bearing the UN crest.
"We want to do away with antiquated notions of truth, justice and the American way" explains Echs "and replace them with more of a forward thinking, global friendly kind of attitude"
"We will also be making our characters more "eco-conscious" Echs goes on to explain "For instance; Ghost Rider will no longer be drawn with a flaming skull in order to cut down on CO2 emissions and will now ride a bicycle instead of a motorcycle to reduce the size of his carbon footprint".
Some story ideas were also revealed centering around the predominant theme of "Man-Made Global Warming" and will pit heroes against such serious crisis as second hand smoke, outdoor BBQ's and flatulating cows."
Thespoof.com offers no way to contact authors directly, but I'm hoping that this brilliant and creative person reads these forums and will "out" herself, so that I may shower her with praise! :D