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View Full Version : Scientists Discover New Element, the Heaviest Yet Known to Science: Governmentium




FreedomFighter8008
12-19-2008, 10:23 AM
Lawrence Livermore Laboratories has discovered the heaviest element yet known to science.

The new element, Governmentium (Gv), has one neutron, 25 assistant neutrons, 88 deputy neutrons, and 198 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312.

These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons.

Since Governmentium has no electrons, it is inert; however, it can be detected, because it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact. A tiny amount of Governmentium can cause a reaction that would normally take less than a second, to take from 4 days to 4 years to complete.

Governmentium has a normal half-life of 2- 6 years. It does not decay, but instead undergoes a reorganization in which a portion of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places.

In fact, Governmentium's mass will actually increase over time, since each reorganization will cause more morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes.

This characteristic of morons promotion leads some scientists to believe that Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a critical concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as critical morass.

When catalysed with money, Governmentium becomes Administratium, an element that radiates just as much energy as Governmentium since it has half as many peons but twice as many morons.

(Found at www.NaturalNews.com.)

Lafayette
12-19-2008, 02:32 PM
That put a smile on my face :D

Captain America
12-19-2008, 02:42 PM
great stuff

the biss
12-19-2008, 02:59 PM
Another seldom had true LOL moment on the internet for me. Thanks for posting. :D

gb13
12-19-2008, 03:21 PM
Yay! Science is neat! :D

In contrast, the lightest element is Libertarium. When it comes in contact with governmentium, a chain reaction occurs which creates lighter sub-atomic particles called Paultrons. The Paultrons infiltrate the governmentium neucleus, and hunt down the morons and peons that cause governmentium to become so agonizingly big and slow. The morons and peons are expelled at such a blindingly fast pace that the neutrons break apart and explode. This reaction ultimately creates the much lighter and faster element, "Libertarium Governmentium". Sweet.

-One of nature's most delightful processes to witness.

PatriotLegion
12-19-2008, 04:21 PM
Fire up the proton accelerator! Let's smash some Governmentium!

Texan4Life
12-19-2008, 04:28 PM
LOL!! Thats a good one...

brandon
12-19-2008, 04:50 PM
http://www.ronpaulforums.com/showthread.php?t=170712
http://www.ronpaulforums.com/showthread.php?t=170562
http://www.ronpaulforums.com/showthread.php?t=164832
http://www.ronpaulforums.com/showthread.php?t=133721
http://www.ronpaulforums.com/showthread.php?t=123247
http://www.ronpaulforums.com/showthread.php?t=83939
http://www.ronpaulforums.com/showthread.php?t=42820
http://www.ronpaulforums.com/showthread.php?t=34845
http://www.ronpaulforums.com/showthread.php?t=19689

still funny though