So, somebody forwarded me this e-mail...

[Omphfullas Zamboni]

I'm voting Democrat because: I believe the government will do a better job of spending the money I earn than I would.

I'm voting Democrat because: I believe three or four pointy headed elitist liberals need to rewrite the Constitution every few days to suit some fringe kooks who would NEVER get their agendas past the voters.

I'm voting Democrat because: I believe oil companies' profits of 4% on a gallon of gas are obscene but the government taxing the same gallon of gas at 15% isn't.

I'm voting Democrat because: I believe that paying $4.00 a gallon or more is no reason to drill for the mountain of oil we are sitting on in THIS country. We wouldn't want to have to move a couple of Polar bears now would we?

I'm voting Democrat because: when we pull out of Iraq , I trust that the bad guys will stop what they're doing because they now think we're good people.

I'm voting Democrat because: I like it when planes fly into buildings full of civilians. I want to see more of that.

I'm voting Democrat because: I don't want a stimulus check to spend. Let the government spend it for me.

I'm voting Democrat because: freedom of speech is fine as long as nobody is offended by it.

I'm voting Democrat because: I love the fact that I can now marry whatever I want. I'm going to marry my Horse!

I'm voting Democrat because: I don't want to eat poison food and drink dirty water. We all know Republicans love that stuff. Ever wonder why the most left wing country in the World ( China ) is the polluted?

I'm voting Democrat because: I believe that when the terrorists don't have to hide from us over there; when they come over here I don't want to have any guns in the house to fight them off with.

I also don't need to defend myself against Criminals, because we know they will obey the law and not have guns!!!!!

I'm voting Democrat because: I believe that churches should only be allowed for political speeches and hate promotion.

I'm voting Democrat because: I believe that business should not be allowed to make profits for themselves. They need to break even and give the rest away to the employees. During the years they lose money, that's their problem.

I'm voting Democrat because: I believe that I don't want Doctors who were at the top of their classes to operate on me. I want a government employee who makes $50k a year and couldn't hack it as a contractor or an engineer.

I'm voting Democrat because: I believe that people who can't tell us if it will rain on Friday CAN tell us that the polar ice caps will melt away in ten years if I don't start driving a Prius.

I'm voting Democrat because: I REALLY believe there is no bias in the media. I'm All for CHANGE!

[aspiringconstitutionalist]

Fascinating how some people can be so inconsistent in the application of their purported principles.

[Omphfullas Zamboni]

Fascinating how some people can be so inconsistent in the application of their purported principles.

That's just it. This kind of GOP doesn't sit well with me.

[amy31416]

I'm voting Democrat because: I love the fact that I can now marry whatever I want. I'm going to marry my Horse!



Isn't that really more of a libertarian position than Democratic?

Nitpicking, I know.

[noxagol]

The GOP should be respelt NAZI as it currently stands. There really is no difference.

[Conza88]

I'm voting Democrat because: I like it when planes fly into buildings full of civilians. I want to see more of that.

I'm voting Democrat because: when we pull out of Iraq , I trust that the bad guys will stop what they're doing because they now think we're good people.

I'm voting Democrat because: I love the fact that I can now marry whatever I want. I'm going to marry my Horse!

I believe that when the terrorists don't have to hide from us over there; when they come over here I don't want to have any guns in the house to fight them off with.

Needs to be removed, but then... Republican Party is DIFFERENT? :rolleyes:

[Omphfullas Zamboni]

The GOP should be respelt NAZI as it currently stands. There really is no difference.

The GOP people really do seem to be scared of Obama, though. It's that some people think there's a difference between the two major party choices that gets me. I don't know what to say. Is there some sort of Obama = McCain = Obama YouTube video available?

[DeadtoSin]

Lately I've been wanting to punch something whenever I read what an ignorant Republican writes.

I don't mind if you write something to convince a person, but all this does is antagonize people.

[Truth Warrior]

I think it's kinda cute. ;)

The Difference between Democrats and Republicans
http://differencebetweendemocratsandrepublicans.com/

An accurate, quick and easy read.<IMHO> :D

[adara7537]

Haven't you seen the Democrats bashing the Republicans video version of this?

[amy31416]

I think it's kinda cute. ;)

The Difference between Democrats and Republicans
http://differencebetweendemocratsandrepublicans.com/

An accurate, quick and easy read.<IMHO> :D

Cliff's Notes please? :p

[Omphfullas Zamboni]

Lately I've been wanting to punch something whenever I read what an ignorant Republican writes.

I don't mind if you write something to convince a person, but all this does is antagonize people.

Originally Posted by Uncle Emanuel Watkins

We should demand that others write in proper essay form because doing so builds bipartisanship. In contrast, partisanship politics tends to produce works of hate mongering jargon that have poorly developed thesis statements.

In fairness to the individual who forwarded this to me, he wasn't being snarky. He just thought it was humorous. He's cool.

[Truth Warrior]

Cliff's Notes please? :p Just read every other line between the lines. :D There will be a pop quiz later. ;)

[amy31416]

Just read every other line between the lines. :D There will be a pop quiz later. ;)

I'm studying my ass off. :p Bring it!

[Michael Landon]

I wrote the following forward and got some interesting responses:

DECIDED


I HAVE DECIDED TO BECOME A WRITE-IN CANDIDATE HERE IS MY PLATFORM:

(1) Press 1 for English is immediately banned. This is America where we welcome everyone from all over the world. My first day in office, I'll pass a law that states that all printed and spoken words must be spoke in all languages. I'm sorry if this will be an inconvenience and time consuming but if you get an automated response when making a telephone call there will be the opportunity to Press 2 for Spanish, Press 3 for German, Press 4 for Swedish, and so on until every language is accounted for. I don't really want to discriminate against anyone, and I'm sure you don't either.

(2) We will immediately go into an open boarders policy. "Welcome to your new home" will be our new motto. Everyone should be allowed to live in this great country and receive our cheap imported goods. We will also stop exporting our goods, why should we make our goods available to other countries when it's easier and cheaper for them to buy from China like we do? Actually, effective immediately, we will no longer make domestic goods. It's much cheaper for everyone in America to have the youthful Chinese make the goods at lesser prices and ship them to us. This will be called the "Walmart Act of 2008".

(3) When exports are allowed, there will be a 100% domestic tax on it, paid entirely by Americans, to help feed the Chinese children that work so hard to assemble our IPods and Nintendo Wiis.

(4) All retired military personnel will be required to man one of our many observation towers on the southern border. (sixty year tour) They will be under strict orders to help all aliens cross our boarders in a save and timely manner. They will also give the new American citizens the correct forms to receive welfare checks, social security, food stamps, free housing and Wal-Mart Gift Cards.

(5) Social Security will immediately be given to all American citizens of foreign nationality. Their checks will be paid for by all the fat and lazy American born citizens making over $8 an hour. If you are one of these citizens I encourage you to quit your job and head down to the unemployment office where you can receive all sorts of free goods from your government for not working. "Why work for money when you can stay home and watch television and get free money?" will be our second motto.

(6) Welfare checks will be given on all the odd days of every month. Why should you have to wait until the 1st of every month to receive your hard earned money? You took the time to fill out the paper work so you could receive your money so you will get your money 15-16 times a month. This will go into effect within my 1st week of the Presidency.

(7) Professional Athletes --Steroids - if you want to use drugs to make you stronger and faster, go ahead. We would much rather watch fast and strong athletes on television over the weak and puny any day of the week. When I become President, within my 1st week of the Presidency, I'll make sure everyone will receive steroids along with their welfare checks, social security checks, and food stamps. Everyone should be allowed to look sexy without having to put the time in working out. If the steroids don't make you attractive to potential mates then I'll also make it a priority as President to give everyone vouchers to receive government paid liposuction. We should have the most beautiful citizens to go along with our most beautiful country.

(8) Crime - We will adopt my newly formed "forgiving method." Everyone will be forgiven when they make a common error such as raping someone. I'm sure it wasn't your fault you raped someone, it was probably your lousy childhood upbringing that caused you to make a simple and easily forgivable mistake. "You are forgiven" will be another of my wonderful mottos for this country.

(9) One export will be allowed, Wheat, the world needs to eat. We will export all our wheat to foreign countries to make sure that all citizens of these countries greater than ours get 3500 calories a day to survive and if there are any extra bushels of wheat we will give them to the young Chinese workers as a bonus for all the hard work they put in to give us lower priced goods like televisions.

(10) All foreign aid using American taxpayer money will immediately be increased. American-born citizens that are dumb enough to work should be forced to pay for all the needs of foreign countries. Foreigners are greater than us and they should be awarded for that with money and free land if they choose to come over here.

(11) The Pledge of Allegiance will be changed to something more foreign friendly. Perhaps a song such as "We are the World." Actually, my 1st week as your President I will create a new branch of the government whose primary function will be to create a new Pledge of Allegiance to the United Nations. Why should we pledge allegiance to this country when there are so many other countries out there that are much better than ours? Besides we wouldn't want to force the new American citizens from Mexico and Canada to pledge allegiance to America when I'm sure they love their country more. No more discriminating against the new Americans. "Love Mexico and Canada more than you love America" will be another great motto of mine.

(12) The National Anthem will be played at all appropriate ceremonies, sporting events, outings, etc. But our old National Anthem will have to be tossed aside because it's outdated. My newly formed "National Anthem" committee will create a better National Anthem that incorporates the National Anthems from all over the world into one grand World National Anthem. "Love the world like you love yourself" will be the chorus.

(13) There will be no more election periods. The government will take care of the elections to ensure there isn't voter fraud. We will pick all the winners because we know what's best for you. Because you'll no longer be voting on the first Tuesday in November, we'll mail you a check so you can go shopping instead. We will also make sure that the NFL airs it's best match-up for that week on primetime television so you'll have something to watch on your newly purchased High-Definition Television. You're welcome.

(14) All congressional terms will be open-ended. The politicians may step down when they want to. No sense in forcing them out.

Sorry if I stepped on anyone's toes but a vote for me will get you better than what you have, and better than what you're going to get. Thanks for listening, and remember to write my name in this November.

Change we can believe in.

Copy it and send it on if you would like to.

- ML

[Conza88]

Change we can believe in. [/I]

Copy it and send it on if you would like to.

- ML
Hahah... :D

[slothman]

I'm not going to go through all of this, unless you reall want, but hows come the
repub's from 2k to 2k6 didn't remove all this bad stuff.

Actually I will sell you this rock that keeps tigers, terroists away.
Just because buildings and other terrorists haven't occured doesn't mean the repubs are doing a good job.